Mr FD and I took some food over to his parents on Saturday afternoon. His father, aged 93, is not eating, and has lost a lot of weight, so we tried to tempt him with a few nice treats.
It was not quite the success we had anticipated as he sat and chewed each mouthful, and then after awhile of chewing he would spit out each mouthful onto his plate. So by the end of his meal his plate was circled with small chewed spit balls of what was once food. It is as though he is just taking the flavour and the juices from the food, but no solids.
We discussed getting protein drinks for him, but MrFD’s mother will hear none of it. He has a drink of sustagen at night and in her opinion that is quite adequate for him. We will ignore her and investigate the protein drinks anyway. I checked the fridge and many of their meals from Meals On Wheels which get delivered to them during the week are sitting uneaten in the fridge. Mother Dearest looks as though she has lost weight as well. She is 88.
She is almost as bad as the old man. When she eats she has started clicking her teeth together so there is this incredible clunking noise as she chews her meal. He is chewing and spitting and she is chewing and clicking and we sit in the middle waiting for the minutes to tick by so that we can flee.
It is time for them to go into care, well past the time, but they are yet to sign the papers. Doesn’t matter how much of a burden they are to their children, they think it is their right to demand constant servitude. The burden is mostly upon Mr FD’s sister, mostly due to her own efforts many years ago, when she intervened when we almost had them in care, so letting her stew is her due in some ways, but not to this degree.
One can live too long, for one’s own sake, and the sake of the family.
There, I said it.